Daily Prompt: Forgive and Forget

Share a story where it was very difficult for you to forgive the perpetrator for wronging you, but you did it — you forgave them.

Back in 2003 I got together with this woman who I met online in a chat room. She was from out-of-town and had a four-year old daughter. I liked her and her daughter and we started dating. Before long we moved in together and were engaged pretty quickly after that.

My family and friends were all against it though were ready to accept her because I did though I defended her to all of them. She didn’t get a job like she promised and continued you party quite often with her friends leaving me to look after her kid. We lived together for about 7 months before breaking up and afterwards I had heard from two different people that she was with a new guy, one of them said she had married him. Even her daughter said she and the guy were living together. I couldn’t believe it. After trying to defend her, she proved everyone right. I had to cut ties with her and her family. Cutting ties with her daughter was the hardest as she had gotten to like me a lot.

I didn’t date for a year after that and partied quite a bit for a few months. I moved and once I settled into my new apartment I stopped the partying but was still pretty lonely. I started going to church after a recommendation from a friend and made a lot of friends there and over time was able to let go of the hurt.

I think that forgiving someone is the easy part but the forgetting is the part that takes work. It is too easy to replay what the person did over and over and sometimes takes awhile to let it go. I know that it is possible to do and I am glad that I did come to forgive her because I would have missed out if I hadn’t. I wound up meeting my wife at church and I believe that I wouldn’t have been able to get married had I not let go of what my ex did.  Not everyone is the person who hurt you and if you carry around the hurt and resentment it will poison future relationships. And forgiveness doesn’t mean that you must have a relationship with the person who hurt you after you forgive them. I don’t have anything to do with my ex though I have run into her a couple of times at the mall and just said hi. A couple of my past girlfriends have looked me up on facebook and I added them though my ex fiance will not be going on FB, my wife has already said no to that as well!

In closing I can’t say that I have totally forgiven everyone in my life though I am working on it. I do know that in time you can forgive those who hurt you!



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